


Lance Falls Down a Hole: A ShitPost™

by xXRedLionDaddyXx (Pixel8)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: but not until after i make fun of him, he will be free someday, he will not stay in the hole, he wont die i promise, i love lance i swear, its a work in progress ok, this is a shitpost ok
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-10-19 10:50:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10638333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pixel8/pseuds/xXRedLionDaddyXx
Summary: Lance falls down a hole. That's it.





	

     The crew had just touched down on another planet. This one was free from Zarkon’s control, and so was a potential new member of the Voltron alliance. Its denizens were primarily aquatic, living deep within the ocean under the planet’s crust, leaving the surface mostly barren. The harsh sun beat down on the series of craters that served as the team’s access point to the civilization below. Because the blue lion was best suited for underwater missions, the rest of the team remained on the surface as Lance and Coran went to negotiate with the planet’s ruler. The two had been gone for quite some time now.

     “I spy with my little eye… something brown.” Hunk said, squinting into the distance.  
     “Gee, Hunk, you really picked a tough one this time,” Pidge teased, “Could it be… _another rock?_ ”  
     “Correct again, little buddy!” Hunk beamed, “that’s 37 for you, 36 for me.”  
     Keith stopped pacing, as he had been doing ever since they landed, and groaned. “Will you two knock it off,” he said impatiently, “what if something happened down there? We need to go after them.”  
     “ _Relax,_ ” a voice spoke from above. Keith looked up to see Shiro laying on top of the black lion, wearing a pair of sunglasses he procured through unknown means. Evidently, Shiro decided to take this time as an opportunity to sunbathe. Spending most of your days as a prisoner in deep space sure does ruin a guy’s tan. “I’m sure they’re fine,” he continued, “Have a little more faith in Lance.”  
     Keith raised an eyebrow, his arms crossed, as he questioned his unquestionable leader’s judgement. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? This is _Lance_ we’re talking about. Besides, we haven’t received any transmissions from them since they’ve gone down there.”  
     “Well,” Shiro replied, “Coran warned us that they might have difficulties communicating with us from underground, and Allura _did_ say the people of this planet were some of the friendliest in the universe.”  
     “That was ten thousand years ago, Shiro!” Keith argued, “Who knows what could’ve happened in that time!” 

     Suddenly, a rumble erupted from a nearby crater as the blue lion rocketed out, eventually coming to a smooth landing on the surface. It bent its head downward and opened its jaws as Lance and Coran stepped out. Lance eagerly ran over to greet the rest of the team.  
     “Hey guys, you won’t believe what happened down there!” Lance exclaimed, “It was _crazy_! Coran and I saved everyone.”  
     Coran chimed in, “The Raspluvian empire had been infiltrated by a band of Galra soldiers in disguise, but we fought them off and freed the king from their deadly mind control!”  
     “It was awesome! I was all like, _pew pew pew_ , and Coran was totally badass, doing flips and stuff! There was at least a season’s worth of material!”  
As Lance continued to describe his and Coran’s daring exploits, Shiro, now on the ground with the rest of the team, placed a firm hand on Keith’s shoulder.  
     “See? You just need to have a little more faith in him.”  
Keith looked up to his teammate and brotherly figure, arms still crossed. Clearly displeased at having worried for nothing, yet acknowledging the fact he was wrong, he decided not to push the subject further and said nothing, as any moody teenage boy would do.  
     “Well, well, well, if it isn’t _Keith,_ ” Lance sneered as he called the red paladin’s attention, “Looks like I got to save the day this time! Guess I’m the super-cool, heroic one now. Bet you wish you could’ve gotten in on some of the action. What did you guys do out here anyway, _count rocks?_ ”  
Keith furrowed his brows and opened his mouth to reply before feeling Shiro’s grip tighten on his shoulder. He looked up and was met with his leader’s disapproving gaze.  
     “Good job, or whatever,” He grumbled to Lance, pulling himself free from Shiro’s grasp and turning towards the lions, “I’ll be in red if you need me.”  
     Lance scratched his head as his teammate stormed off. “What’s his problem?”  
     “ _Lance,_ ” Shiro spoke sternly, “You know you shouldn’t provoke him like that.”  
     “I didn’t provoke him!” Lance argued, “It’s not my fault he’s a hothead!”

     The two were interrupted as Coran whizzed by them, excitedly shouting something sciency at the top of his lungs, with Pidge and Hunk in tow. The three came to a stop in front of a nearby crater, noticeably smaller than the others they’d seen when scoping out a good entry point for the blue lion.  
     “Why, I can’t believe it,” The mustachioed Altean exclaimed, “Never in my life did I think I’d come across one of these babies!”  
     “It’s… a hole.” Pidge stated with confusion.  
     “ _Pidge,_ ” Hunk shushed his small, green companion, “He’s obviously excited to see this hole, so let’s just walk away before anything weird ha-”  
     “ _It is anything but an ordinary hole!_ ” Coran interjected, “It’s a _Wasdibjugien!_ "  
     “A was-did-what-now?” Pidge deadpanned.  
     “A Wasdibjugien! Unlike the other craters on Axglibar’s surface, these don’t lead to the ocean below.”  
     “Then where do they go?” Hunk asked.  
     “That’s the beauty of it- Nobody knows! It’s supposedly bottomless.”  
Hunk and Pidge looked at each other quizzically for a moment, before Hunk pulled out a space banana he had kept as a snack for later and unpeeled it. He grabbed its spotted blue peel and handed its contents to Pidge, who immediately dropped it into the wasdib-whatever. The two leaned forward, waiting in anticipation for the sound of the banana hitting the bottom. After about a minute of silence, they decided that it maybe was bottomless, or very deep at the least.  
     “Hey, wait up you guys!” Lance shouted as he ran over in an attempt to avoid Shiro’s scolding. Unfortunately for Lance, his foot came down on something soft as he neared the edge of the hole. Something _slippery_. And just like that, the blue paladin, leg of the mighty Voltron, was falling ass-first into a bottomless pit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in which hunk gets more dialogue than in the actual series


End file.
